to Move the Universe
Hi! I am Deepshikha. Prior to chanting Nam Myoho-renge-kyo, I was unhappy and pessimistic and did not really believe I could ever be optimistic and happy in my life.
Two and a half years ago, I was introduced to Nichiren Daishonin’s Buddhism by my cousin. I took up this practice when I was struggling to complete my Company Secretary exam. I had tried everything from astrology to Vastu, and whatever else I could find, but it was no help. As a last hope, I started chanting and attending activities. Within six months of my chanting, I received a benefit in the form of a job. It is really a kosen-rufu job because the working hours are flexible, and I get a lot of time for attending activities.
During these two and a half years of practice, I became a YWD (young women’s division) Block Chief and also become part of the special groups Byakuren and New Dawn. As my responsibility in the organization grew, my activities also increased and this resulted in objections from my family. But still I continued. With lots of study, I was able to understand this philosophy and I started sharing it with my friends and relatives. Although I didn’t have much actual proof (about which I was often asked by my friends), I was able to do Shakubuku (introducing others). I don’t know what they saw in me.
During these two and a half years of practice, I have grown as a person, but I was not able to show the actual proof in the form of passing my Company Secretary exam. I read lot of Sensei’s guidance, The New Human Revolution, the Gosho, and even received guidance from senior leaders, but I was still not able to pass my exams. Every time I took the exams, I would miss by the same margin — as if there was an indication for me to change something, but what? That was yet to be discovered by me.
This time, I again appeared for my exams in June. Just before my exams, the work pressure increased, and my boss didn’t allow me to take more than three days leave. I was angry because I was not getting enough time to study, but my honest prayer to the Gohonzon was that I will show up for my exams no matter what, and I will pass whether I know all the answers or not. Finally, along with lot of problems (in the form of my own mental tension), I took my exams.
Time passed, and I chanted for so many other things. Just 10 days before receiving my test result, I realized I had forgotten to chant for my result. I stepped up my Daimoku to three hours and 20 minutes — which was really taking me out of my comfort zone. I have never in these two and a half years of practice chanted so much. Even in the middle of night, my parents would find me chanting — they thought I had gone mad. But I knew what I was doing.
During these chanting sessions, I actually understood the meaning of DETERMINATION and WINNING. Gohonzon showed me my weakness — the determination to win was never in me before. So I started chanting with this determination — I WILL WIN NO MATTER WHAT. I would even visualize that Sensei (President Ikeda) is sending daimoku to all of us, so how can I be defeated? I am happy to report that this time I passed one of the tests. My struggle of passing the tests is not yet over, but now I can say that I am struggling but happy. Now I know that the key to victory for myself is IN myself. Here I would like to quote Sensei:
“Determination is not just words. True determination contains earnest prayer and brims with concentrated energy. It gives rise to wholehearted action and leads without fail to splendid victory.”I have learned that no guidance or daimoku will help, if we do not have the determination and will to change things. Our innermost determination can move the universe. And you must persevere — do not give up, because once you do, you are defeated.
(Shared on 10th Sept. 06 Discussion